At least he’s not duckfacing.
"Ok… Let’s go."
I want my gravestone to read “Two trips are for pussies.”
(Source: lightningthoughts, via portlandia)
What Pandora has taught us. [via]
“YOU’LL BE THE ONE CRYING ALL THE WAY HOME, PAL!!!”
You came to the wrong neighborhood…
"Hey Steve, didn’t there used to be… I mean, I coulda sworn there used to be an IHOP there. How long has it been an Applebees?”
(Source: lawebloca, via togifs)
Pragmatic Bunny is pragmatic.
New Mexico man says he was anally probed 8 times after routine traffic stop -
A New Mexico man has filed a federal lawsuit claiming authorities subjected him to eight anal probes including enemas and a colonoscopy after a routine traffic stop.
Note to self: Stay the fuck out New Mexico.
"I was gonna punch you but I’m holding wine."
That headline is the greatest thing Redman has written since "I’ll Bee Dat!"
For what it’s worth I’ve used a Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Taco to get into a night club.